Relationships

Is Divorce The Best Option To Unhealthy Marriage?

Divorce has become a prevalent issue in our today’s society.  According to research, the rate at which divorce is increasing has become alarming.  Lot of couples are presently planning to divorce while many are on it already just waiting for the court proceedings, making the situation scary.  This trend  depicts divorce as the best option to unhealthy marriage, but this is a big fallacy.During my research on this case, I came across several reasons why couples go for divorce, but the surprising thing about those reasons are  that they  do not specifically account for the increasing rate of divorce which depicts divorce as the best option to unhealthy marriage. Therefore, if we really want to save the society we should trace the factors responsible for the increasing rate of divorce to clear this subterfuge.

Facts are that many marriages meet with myriad problems, but before, couples were willing to patch these problems than they do now.  We have lost patience in patching our marriage to avoid divorce.  Why the sudden change?

Divorce, which couples try to avoid even in an unhealthy marriage, is now seen as an easy escape to marriage quagmires.  The essence of this article is not to discuss the reasons couples divorce; I choose to point out the factors responsible for the increasing rate of divorce.  It will help reduce the ease at which couples rush to lawyer for divorce.  This is very important because divorce is not only affecting the couples but also their children and the society.  These four factors outlined below, if couples know about them, will reduce divorce to minimum.

Four factors that are responsible for the increasing rate of divorce

1. The decadence of societal morals, ethics, and values.

One of the adverse effects of civilization is the lost of morals, ethics and values.  People are willing to do anything they feel like as long as it is not repugnance to the laws of their country.  Couples see infidelity as a norm.  Couples divorce just to be free to live, as they wanted.  There was a time women were ashamed to be called divorcees but now some women may wish to even divorce ten husbands to top the chat of highest divorcers.  The decay of moral, ethics, and values will give birth to abuse of freedom of choice.

2. Abuse of freedom of choice.

Many Countries practice democracy; this form of government accords certain rights to individuals, which include freedom of choice.  It gives spouses the right to choose to remain in marriage or not.  This right deters mutualism which marriage is supposed to promote.  A spouse will commit  many unbearable atrocities unacceptable to the partner and will claim it is his or her life and that he or she has every right to live the way he or she pleases; when the problem reaches crescendo, he or she start seeking divorce, which is his or her right too.  We forget that our right should be used justifiably for social intercourse and when we seek divorce because we have right to, we are abusing such right by using it to cause harm to the society because our action has adverse effects on the emotion of our children.  When a spouse is ready to abuse this freedom of choice, he or she sees “for better for worse vow” as an enslavement tool.

3. The Mindset of being enslaved by “For better for worse vow”.

Problem is one of the uncertainties of marriage.  One can handle it just like every other life problems with maturity of mind without involving a third-party if there is a good understanding between the two parties involved.  Couples don’t see “for better for worse” as a vow that must not be broken rather they see it as a paradigm that enslaves and locks them into unhealthy marriage.  They often believe that the reason their partner chooses to be erring is because of the vow and swear to divorce to be free from such enslavement.  After the divorce, they will realize they have made a mistake, but choose to conceal it to be able to live freely.

4. Concealing the truth.

The rate of divorce is alarming because couples are getting the wrong information from divorce experts and lawyers.90% of divorce couples consult divorce expert and divorce lawyers before filing a divorce, so if they are actually telling them the truth about divorce, the rate will not be skyrocketing.  In addition, many divorced couples conceal the fact that divorce was the worse decision they made.  This they do to avoid becoming an object of mockery, but the truth is that they just realized they made mistake.  About 80% of divorce couples knew they made mistake, this is the reason they are quick telling their friends how happy they were after the divorce.  In real sense, one need not advertise happiness; it radiates outwardly and not hidden.

In my next edition, I will explain why the projected causes of divorce are but a mirage and ways to tackle those problems.  Meanwhile, I will like to hear your view on factors responsible for increasing rate of divorce in our society.  To live in ideal world, we need to start correcting many societal flaws, most especially divorce.

Anthony-Claret Onwutalobi
Anthony-Claret Onwutalobi
Anthony-Claret is a software Engineer, entrepreneur and the founder of Codewit INC and CEO of Portia Web Solutions. Mr. Claret publishes and manages the content on Codewit Word News website and associated websites. He's a writer, IT Expert, great administrator, technology enthusiast, social media lover and all around digital guy.
https://www.codewit.com

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